2010 Jokes, Humour and Funny Stuff

hahaha, very good.

Funny, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmYDgncMhXw

Edited by Yoldering 2010-09-28 1:29 AM

This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed. It is reported to have been listed in the Atlanta Journal.




SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me... Call (404) 875-6420 and ask for Annie, I'll be waiting.....






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Over 150 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society.




Edited by Yoldering 2010-09-28 9:20 PM






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Just as cute as when you posted it the first time.

Darn It...I thought it looked familiar...

You think English is easy???


1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce .

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to
present the present .

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row .

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow..

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Not really a joke or even funny for that matter but
This October has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays, all in one month. It happens once in 823 years.

that means you have to live as long as Yoda to even have a chance of seeing it twice in your life time.

well I tried to make it funny

Cool - I had all those days off from work.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm?

Biting into an apple and finding half a worm.......

Even worse is booting up your computer and finding a worm.

Even worse, going potty and finding part of a tapeworm...

Way, way TMI, Rich.

Suppose that once a month, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all of them comes to £100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes and claim State benefits, it would go something like this;
The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing. The fifth would pay £1.?The sixth would pay £3.?The seventh would pay £7.?The eighth would pay £12.?The ninth would pay £18.?And the tenth man (the richest) would pay £59.
So, that’s what they decided to do. The ten men drank in the bar every month and seemed quite happy with the arrangement until, one day, the owner caused them a little problem. “Since you are all such good customers,” he said, “I’m going to reduce the cost of your weekly beer by £20.” Drinks for the ten men would now cost just £80.
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes. So the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free but what about the other six men; the paying customers? How could they divide the £20 windfall so that everyone would get his fair share? They realised that £20 divided by six is £3.33 but if they subtracted that from everybody’s share then not only would the first four men still be drinking for free but the fifth and sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.
So the bar owner suggested a different system. The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing.?The sixth man paid £2 instead of £3 .?The seventh paid £5 instead of £7.?The eighth paid £9 instead of £12.?The ninth paid £14 instead of £18.?And the tenth man now paid £49 instead of £59. ?Each of the last six was better off than before with the first four continuing to drink for free.
But, once outside the bar, the men began to compare their savings. “I only got £1 out of the £20 saving,” declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man, “but he got £10!”
“Yes, that’s right,” exclaimed the fifth man. “I only saved a £1 too. It’s unfair that he got ten times more benefit than me!”
“That’s true!” shouted the seventh man. “Why should he get £10 back, when I only got £2? The rich get all the breaks!”
“Wait a minute,” yelled the first four men in unison, “we didn’t get anything at all. This new tax system exploits the poor!”
So, the nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up. Funnily enough, the next month the tenth man didn’t show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had their beers without him.
But when it came to pay for their drinks, they discovered something important – they didn’t have enough money between all of them to pay for even half the bill.
That’s how our tax system works. The people who already pay the highest taxes do tend to get the most benefit from tax reliefs and reductions. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy and they just might not show up anymore.
For those who understand, no explanation is needed.?For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.